I’m ten days into learning scalping.
I’m still very much in the learning phase, so I’m trading on a demo account. The goal right now isn’t to prove anything. It’s to understand myself, my habits, and how I behave under pressure.
The first eight days went surprisingly well.
The ninth and tenth didn’t.
Not because the strategy stopped working,
but because I changed.
The first eight days
For the first eight days, things felt calm and controlled.
I followed my plan almost to the tick:
- I entered only when conditions were met
- I let trades hit take profit
- I stepped away after two losses
- I stopped trading once my session rules were met
Emotionally, I was steady. Detached. Clear.
I wasn’t thinking about money.
I was thinking in points.
And when the plan was done, I walked away.
It felt sustainable.
What changed on days nine and ten
On day nine, I decided to increase my position size.
Not drastically.
Not recklessly.
Risk-wise, it was still well within what I considered acceptable.
But mentally, something shifted.
I started imagining the demo account as a real one.
I started thinking in dollar value instead of points.
And with that came a subtle but noticeable fear.
How fear showed up
The fear wasn’t loud, it was quiet and sneaky.
I noticed myself:
- wanting to cut profits early because the dollar amount “felt big”
- feeling anxious even when price was moving correctly
- focusing on protecting money instead of executing the plan
- hesitating in ways I hadn’t before
The strategy didn’t change.
The market didn’t change.
My relationship with size did.
A familiar thought pattern
Another thought crept in during those two days:
If I don’t trade, I don’t make money.
That belief pushed me to want to be in trades, even when conditions weren’t ideal.
But trading doesn’t work that way.
Not trading is a decision.
Stepping away is part of the plan.
Capital preservation is progress.
I knew this intellectually, but those two days reminded me how easily old narratives resurface when size increases.
What I did right (and want to return to)
Looking back, the difference between the first eight days and the next two was clear.
When I was trading smaller:
- I trusted the plan
- I thought in points, not money
- I respected my stop conditions
- I had emotional distance
When I increased size too early:
- I became outcome-focused
- I felt pressure to “make more”
- I reacted instead of executed
The issue wasn’t skill.
It was readiness.
The real lesson
The biggest lesson from these ten days isn’t about scalping.
It’s this:
Size amplifies what’s already there.
If discipline is solid, size reveals confidence.
If discipline is shaky, size exposes fear.
I increased size before my nervous system was ready to hold it, even on demo.
That awareness alone makes these ten days worthwhile.
For now
I’m slowing back down.
Returning to the size where:
- execution feels neutral
- emotions stay quiet
- decisions feel boring
Because boring, in trading, is often a good sign.
This is still learning.
And learning doesn’t move in straight lines.
With clarity,
Elian